INTERNATIONAL WOMEN’S DAY - GENDER EQUALITY ?? HOW?? - LOVE AND RESPECT WOMEN FIRST - 08-MAR-2013

INTERNATIONAL WOMEN’S DAY

GENDER EQUALITY ?? HOW??

08-MAR-2013

Women’s day, elders’ day and Mothers’ day are all primarily western concepts. If you don’t care for someone all the year long, you must remember them and honor them one day in a year.  

Where is your Mother? In the Old age home.

Where is your daughter? In the school Hostel.

Where is your small child? In the Crèche

And where is the crèche? In my wife’s place.

Where is the wife? In a far off country. 

When do you meet them? I remember them. Always on mother’s day, women’s day and children’s day.

Is it the culture you want? 

We need to resurrect a culture in which family stays at one place for the longest possible time. We need to promote a culture, in which each member of a family is determined to and actually takes responsibility  for each others’ welfare and happiness.

Being a CEO, a Director, a vice-president or a GM is not a substitute for being a member of a happy and homogeneous family. We must clearly distinguish real, clear happiness from the illusion of EGO satisfaction.

India always had the Highest respect for women – until the West Asian attackers came on the scene to destroy the local civilization. Temples were erased, women were brutalized and taken prisoners and all that the civilization valued was put to the sword. These are facts of life written proudly by the invading kings or their courtiers themselves. After them came the western invaders and the damage was complete.

Today, the face of Indian civilization is a mockery of what it was before the West Asian and Western invasions took place. In any war prior to these invaders, no woman was even touched by any one. Harming a child, a woman or a old person was considered the worst sin even in a war. It is far cry from the rape-a-day culture that is the order of the day now.

No doubt, India lost its freedom because of complacency on the part of its Defence and Offence  capabilities and  too much concentration on civilizational aspects.

In reality, the civilizational aspects, including artistic, scientific, spiritual and religious aspects,  give rise to the maximum happiness to both women and men. Defence and offence are for guarding this freedom and for creative happiness. Both are essential for surviving and thriving. Else, someone can always spring a surprise by saying – we can finish off 100 crore people within fifteen minutes. And, India does not seem to adequately watch such people, even today. We don’t learn our lessons that easily.

That said, today is women’s day. There is a typical western type clamour for GENDER EQUALITY.

The cry for equality comes automatically, when men do not respect and love women adequately and prove that their love and respect are far superior to the elusive and meaningless concept of GENDER EQUALITY.

It was the stupidity and lack of concern of men that has given rise to this meaningless concept of equality. Indian men became predominantly drunkards, callous to the basic human rights of women, forgot that woman is the pillar of their sustenance and started perpetrating unacceptable crimes against women and children. 

This should change drastically. Men must shun their pernicious drinking habit totally. On the other hand, under the garb of Gender Equality, women also want to go in for the drinking habit. It is stupidity and nothing else. My advice and suggestion to women is – please do not ape man’s bad habits. Make him shun his.

Coming to the question of equality, even a bit of thinking can tell all of us that there is no equality between one man and another man; and between one woman and another woman. So, how can there be equality between the two genders. Man and woman combined is one single entity. This has been the Indian concept and possibly the healthiest and most realistic concept of the human creation. Even the god here is ARDHA NAREESWARA. Half man and Half woman. Put together, he is GOD himself.

Being a CEO or a PM or being highly educated is not a bar for woman. But, not being a loving and lovable wife, daughter, sister and mother certainly is a huge handicap for woman. We may like to rule the world. Many tried. None of them are here today. The ones who truly ruled their life were those who loved and got loved. Not the CEOs or the PMs or the Kings. There is no need that your names must be known to the whole world. That is another stupidity many people indulge in. Being famous or infamous is not a substitute for living a joyful life. The world No.1 richest man or woman is still poorer than you in terms of happiness, which alone, really matters in life.

And that happiness which is the real riches must be enured by healthy living together of man and woman.

This is possible only if man respects his mother, his wife, his sister and his daughter as much as he respects himself and much more than that.

I am not for Gender Equality. But, I am for -  far greater respect and love for the woman than for the man. This, in my view, is the essence of civilization.

The ancient Indian scripture says – where the women are unhappy, there the Gods do not smile. Where the women shed tears, there the rains do not fall.

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NEWS TODAY - 7TH AND 6TH - Suopreme Court, the Saviour - Cabint needs Kudos too - Catholic church on organ donation drive - Nirbhaya to get US Award -

What are News Today?

(07-Mar-2013)

1.    SUPREME COURT CASTIGATES PUNJAB, BIHAR COPS FOR VIOLATION OF HUMAN RIGHTS :

It was very clear to every viewer of any TV Channel that the caning of the woman who went to complain about the misbehavior of a Lorry driver was  the MOST ATROCIOUS crime that the Police could commit. And, they did commit such atrocious crime. They are absolutely and totally unfit to be called POLICEMEN. Now, the Punjab Government was prevaricating in a manner as if the RIGHTS of the Policemen are at stake and not that of the woman who was abused by the lorry driver and assaulted by the Policemen. It is difficult to believe all this. But, these are clear, incontrovertible facts.

In olden days, if king doesn’t uphold dharma, people prayed to God. But now, we have a SUPREME COURT. However much the media may criticize the court for JUDICIAL ACTIVISM, the common man welcomes such ACTIVISM.  It has always resulted in common good. As the court has said several times, it is a DUTY  cast upon the court by the constitution and it is determined  to discharge that duty.

At least now, the Punjab Government must act fast. It should put the Criminal Policemen behind bars and prosecute them. This case is as bad as the DELHI RAPE CASE, especially because Police brutalized a woman, who went to complain against sexual harassment by a Lorry driver. The Lorry driver and his accomplices must also be apprehended and Jailed immediately. The media (specially TV channels)  is , as always, wrong, in indicating her, as DALIT WOMAN. If that be so, what about the castes of Policemen, the lorry driver and his accomplice? What of the (obviously Forward) caste of  the victims in Gopal Kanda case?  Media must avoid caste-slant in such news. A suffering woman is just that. Treat her as such.

Ditto – in respect of the caning of the TEACHERS in Bihar.

We must wholeheartedly thank the SUPREME COURT for its prompt action and condemn the two state governments for their INACTION and callousness. I wish the News papers put such items on Page.1 and  not on Page.14.

2.    SOON, GOVT STAFF WHO DELAY SERVICES MAY FACE FINES

The Union cabinet reportedly is considering a Bill to impose fines on Government servants who delay delivery of services – like Pensions, Pass Ports, caste certificates, Ration cards, and tax refunds.  Penalty is Rs.250 per day of delay  subject to a maximum of Rs.50000 per default. Such Positive steps need Page.1.coverage. Yes. TOI has put it at Front page as first news. Congrats to the Union Cabinet for a good Law. Congrats to TOI for putting it deservedly as Front page, first news.

3.    CATHOLICS PLEDGE ORGANS THIS LENT : JOY OF GIVING

This Lent,  the CATHOLICS CHURCH in Tamilnadu is on a mass organ donation drive. Up to Easter on March,31^st, Parishes across Tamilnadu state have been and will be  urging members  to donate Blood and  register themselves as ORGAN DONORS.  It is a commendable move by the Catholic Church.

 I know, many other organizations of other religions (like Hindu, sikh etc) are also conducting such drives. But, this one is organized directly by the Church and on a mass scale. Kudos to the Catholic Church of Tamilnadu. I urge all other religious organizations to follow suit and do better in this drive to save suffering humanity.

 The Tamilnadu Government can take the cue and send volunteers from its Health services department for House to House Organ donation campaign. Then, it will cover all people of Tamilnadu. May be, Tamilnadu can become the first state anywhere on earth, to organize this organ donation drive especially.  

4.    NIRBHAYA TO BE HONOURED WITH US AWARD (DT.6^TH)

US STATE DEPARTMENT has decided to honour  NIRBHAYA with a posthumous Bravery Award. Her family will receive the award in Delhi. She was the unfortunate victim of a mass rape and murder and deserves all sympathies. Her family deserves all support, financial and otherwise. Also, the true honor for her is  Justice Verma’s report and action thereon.  

Readers may differ here with me – but, I feel, if an award for BRAVERY is to be given, it should be for the Boy who stood by her till the end, without giving up and without running away.

5.    GOVT PLANS TO REDUCE AGE OF CONSENT TO 16 (DT:6^TH)

Government has now proposed to lower the age for consensual sex to 16 from 18. In my view, this is a meaningless, risky measure. I have already covered its implications in another Blog Post. What is meant by consensual sex?

How many times in a day or month, can a girl of 16 have consensual sex? Where are our ethics, morals etc going when girls of 16 indulge in such free sex? I am against this measure.

If sex is a major factor at age 16, permit marriage also at age 16. That too, with the person with whom the girl wants to have sex. Otherwise, it is a bad measure. I do not support a measure which permits sex with many, love with a few and marriage with someone not in either group.

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CONSENSUAL SEX - AT AGE 16 - PROGRESSION, DIGRESSION OR RETROGRESSION?

CONSENSUAL SEX AT AGE 16

PROGRESSION, DIGRESSION OR RETROGRESSION?

No one can alter a Huge flood’s course. No one can stop a Psunami. No one can stop a meteor falling on the earth.  It is so with many cultural changes that are taking place in India and elsewhere. Once we have said that, it is progress if we do whatever America does, then, this sort of cultural sweeps are bound to come in, in the garb of laws to ostensibly protect the Girl Child’s rights.

Now, Government wants to make it a law stating that consensual Sex shall be permissible at age 16. Is it only for Girls, or is it for both Boys and Girls? It seems to be a reasonable presumption that Boys also will enjoy the same privilege under the new dispensation.

No one can of course command that, you MUST have consensual sex from age 16. There are no such compulsions humanly feasible. But, YOU CAN have consensual sex, from age 16. This is the next best thing possible under law.

Look at the TV debates on this specific topic. Everybody assumes that this right is given only for the Girl. By the way, at 16, is she a child, a girl or a  woman? God Only knows. Perhaps, even he doesn’t.

The Boy also gets the same right for consensual sex at age 16! Otherwise, with whom else is the Girl going in for a consensual sex? Actually, technically, or, biologically, sex happens at the physical initiation of a BOY only, and technically, the Girl only has to consent – or, not consent.

Can the Boy consent? My foot, he cannot but. Once under a sex impulse, it is very difficult for him to control the sex urge once it arises in him. He has very less power to control it – what to talk of consenting?  He is a victim. He needs an outlet – some outlet. Sex Education is not an outlet by itself. It is a Dam with all gates open. In western countries, most boys get sex when they want it. It is a bit free – almost available on demand. They don’t need to care much about consensual sex  etc. The Girl gets laughed at, if she doesn’t go for dating at all. So, she goes.

Girls also, have as much sex need as boys, once aroused. But, the difference is, they cannot initiate a sex action on a disinterested Boy or man. A Girl or a woman need only consent to have sex – with an interested man or Boy. If this basic difference is forgotten, nothing else  makes sense.

Having consented, she can sleep or eat or talk, or, do whatever she can do, while task is on. If not consented, she has many other options.

Sex is one of the most beautiful boons that the creator has given to human beings – and all other beings, for that matter. But, Indians, especially, have made sex into a great science and an ART. No one else on earth ever thought of or made SEX into such a beautiful art and science. What is the consent for SEX? It is nothing other than marriage. Marriage is consent for sex. Any other consent for sex beyond marital bounds is stupidity and immorality .

Now, we find our law makers reducing the whole gamut of sex into an ugly extra-marital affair, which, by its necessary effect and consequence reduces the marital affair into a non-event and a hugely tasteless, dirty, drab, quarrelsome event. Every extra marital affair before or after marriage, reduces marriage into non-sense. Most divorces on either side is happening because of this one reason, be it in US or in India.

And now, we want to legalize extra-marital and pre-marital sex from age 16. But, marriage still has to wait until 18 for Girls and 21 for Boys !

It is there in the western countries. So, what has happened there? There is now a huge problem of unwed Girl-mothers at ages 13 to 16 in very large numbers. And, many of them do not know the father !

Is it consensual sex or permissive sex that we are ushering in? In my opinion,  it is permissive sex. In west, it started with this only. Now, unwed mothers are very large in number. How will they bring up their children, when they are themselves almost children? By the time, they become mature enough to marry – many of them have lost all taste for sex and marriage with the Opposite sex. So, now, they want sex with same sex. GAYism and Lesbianism is increasing in alarming proportions – and in my view, it is mainly because of the permissive sex with too many people when at school and college. So, marriage with the opposite sex and sex with opposite sex are coming down drastically. Science might tell them this after it is too late. Bt, India can learn these lessons early.

But, we too are on the same path. Permit this consensual sex; it will become permissive sex. Then, there will be lesser and lesser charm  in marriage for both Boys or Girls. Then,  Gayism and Lesbianism will go up as in US – by leaps and bounds.

Let us admit one thing. Very frankly. This consensual or permissive sex, whatever we may call it – has nothing to do with LOVE. It is purely and sheerly the hormonal imbalance that is wrecking havoc on the children. It is much like smoking, drinking and drugs – and much worse than that.

Children cannot understand this easily. But, at least elders must be able to understand this.

It is a known fact that children in the age group of 15 to 18 do have hormonal floods in their system. But, that is the time, when elders must counsel them, advise them and turn their energies into healthier pursuits – and not into sexual pursuits with all and sundry.

Look at the sequence. First we had segregated education. Then, we wanted co-education. Then, we wanted sex education. Now, we want consensual sex.  But, who on earth is counseling them that, sex is much healthier within the precincts of marriage and not outside it?

In India, in earlier days, Boys had to practice Brahmacharya vrat until their education is completed totally. This enabled them to have reasonable and adequate control over their sex instincts. Therefore, Boys respected women of all ages much more than today. Man needs that self control. Even today, even in the context of co-education, the need is not sex education but, Brahma Charya until, one completes Education.

At the same time, we must recognize that at age 16, a man is ripe for sex. So is a woman. Why not get them married, instead of directly and indirectly goading them to have consensual, pre and extra-marital sex? Permit a healthy marriage at age 16 rather than at the artificial limits of 18 and 21.

Government and people are coming half  way to recognizing that a Girl must have the right for consensual sex at age 16. For the same reason, I say, let her also have the right of marriage at age 16. Let the consensual sex be with one man, within the bounds of marriage.

At least it will develop into a healthy, long term, loving relationship between one boy and one girl.

Now, some questions do arise in case of this law and they too need answer.

1.     With how many persons can a girl or boy have consensual sex in the course of a year? Unlimited?

2.     Can we tell the girls and boys – that they can have consensual sex with one boy or one girl only before their marriage?

3.     Can we tell the Boys and Girls that they should marry the same  person with whom they are going to have consensual sex?

4.     Or, are we going to give a go-by to all ethics, morals and decencies in the name of consensual sex?

5.     Can we tell the Boys and Girls both – that they can have consensual sex – only with a person of the OPPOSITE SEX – and that too, one not more than 10 years older to them in age? If the other person is older by 10 years or more, man or woman, it shall not be treated as consensual sex on the part of the boy or girl under 16. A Boy or Girl must not really have consensual sex with someone aged, more than, say, 30 years than them. Or, are we agreeing for that also?

6.     The case of the Boy and the Girl is JUST SLIGHTLY different from each other in sex. The BOY’s physical consent is a must for the sex act. The Girl’s consent is not a must. That is how, nature has made the two sexes – but, it is common for almost all living beings. But, the reality is – the BOY also has very little control on his sex urge – once it is aroused. A Girl’s proximity, here dress, her behavior and his own moods are all factors – that arouse the sex urge. A nude or semi nude scene or a sex scene on his TV is also a powerful mood arouser. Once aroused, most of the time, the boy is not within his own control. His mind does not listen to him anymore. This is a fact, we all know. He may either die, slit a throat  or pour a bottle of acid on his sex object. Anything may happen. Why don’t we understand this simple, common sense event that occurs all the time between Boys and Girls in India? You may laugh at the suggestion of Brahma charya Vrat for Boys. But, it will do a lot of Good for them, for their health and success in marital health. Ditto for girls. Will it a complete success? No. Not at all. It will not succeed totally. It never did, even in the ancient days. But, the very experiment with the vrat will do a lot of good for both boys and Girls.

7.     But, this is a deluge. That is sweeping India. I know, most won’t listen. But, it is time to say, what I have to say.

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